2025-09-28: I Really Needed To See You
- Log: I Really Needed To See You
- Cast: Tsubasa Seki, Ichika Kawase
- Where: Hirasakan Safehouse
- OOC Date: 2025-09-28
- IC Date: Wednesday, July 18 2012 - Dark Hour
- Summary: Ichika visits Tsubasa under cover of the Dark Hour, and helps to explain the supernatural parts of their life which they couldn't disclose otherwise... as well as helping Tsubasa work through the betrayal they're feeling after their mother called the Joker Killer on them.
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
Tsubasa sent a few messages to Ichika, yesterday, after it all: that they'd said they called her and explained everything, and that Myunghon was putting them up somewhere since they were worried about the cops.
They've been dark since then; most of that is due to getting into the safehouse and sleeping for the next consecutive sixteen hours. Luckily, the Cardboard Dragon managed to patch their burns up (DIY-style) before they sent them off, so they at least didn't have a terrible time with the bedsheets when they woke up.
No, they just had a terrible time seeing the news.
And now they're having an extra terrible time, because the world is green and horrible and none of the electronics work any more and they're pretty sure there are monsters out there even though someone at least mentioned to them that they ought to keep the blinds closed in here.
Like, what the fuck.
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
Today, Ichika went hiking. ...It was a nice distraction from everything, but it also meant that she didn't see the news until later, and that did a lot of erode her peace. She knew she had to stay away to keep Tsubasa safe, previously. That she could just lead the cops right to them and that would be a problem.
On the other hand, fuck that, her friend is in the news and it is only a matter of time before the cops actually find Ichika at her dorm or whatever.
So, while the world is green and horrible:
Knock knock knock.
"Hey, Tsubasa-kun. It's Ichika."
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
Muffled, from inside: "What the fuck?!"
A beat later: "No man, I seen this movie, you're some horrific monstrosity sayin' yer the Boss and when I open the door ya gonna blame me for gettin' eatin' 'cuz I invited ya in!"
Oh. Oh, no.
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
"..."
Well, that makes sense. Ichika opens her mouth and closes it. She thinks for a moment about how to be reassuring.
Then, because she's stressed and she's the Boss, she says, "Fuck that! I'm the only person for miles who isn't a goddamn coffin so let me in already, it's creepy as fuck out here and I'm worried about you!"
...There. Reassuring.
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
There is silence, in the house.
A peephole slides open; a blue eye peers out.
"Tch..." She looks like the Boss. She sounds like the Boss. And yeah, they can just about see a coffin on the street behind her.
"Aight, but you better fuckin' make it quick if yer gonna kill me, none of this fuckin' worst outros ever."
There is a click... and another click... and another click...
And then the door opens, and Tsubasa ushers Ichika through before locking and locking and locking the door again.
Inside: it's a small apartment, but it's clean and relatively upkept, and... there are papers all over the walls, taped up there with the fabric tape Tsubasa was supposed to be using to change their dressings because they needed more space than the table allowed them to cover --
-- like, a ton of conspiratorial garbage, at first glance. There are those numbers and figures that have been haunting them for years, of course; but they're joined, now, by arrows connecting different pages to each other, different persons. They read things like:
Denji Inoue: Lying to cover up the Joker Killer. Lying about the fire. What was the purpose of the ECT?
Hanzou Seki: Positively known to Sumaru PD. Probably made mom call that hit in. Getting a promotion. Who's his boss? Who does he answer to? Who noticed him?
Sergeant Ezoe: Sumaru PD. Knows my father. Already blaming me. Who benefits?
... and a dozen less consequential points, at least some of which are really getting into the realm of paranoia.
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
"I'm not gonna kill you," Ichika grumps.
Click, click, click.... And then, Ichika is ushered inside, and she looks around. She's dressed still in her hiking clothes--sturdier boots than usual, mostly, and a tanktop that doesn't expose her midriff but is nicely cleavagey. (Ichika's gonna Ichika.)
It's better than Tsubasa's usual haunt, anyway. Ichika looks around, and her eyes widen when she sees the... stuff. Arrows everywhere. Pages. Persons. Tape.
"Whoa..."
But then she sees the parts that aren't just crazy shit. Denji. Hanzou. ...Ezoe.
Some of it's crazy, but...
"Hey," Ichika says. "Can I give you a hug?"
Ichika finds herself hit by all the worry she'd sublimated into anger earlier.
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
Tsubasa is dressed in -- like -- completely not their own clothes, right now, their uniform was a bit crispy even if somehow their binder survived completely intact. (It must be the superior craftsmanship.) Right now, that's... a hoodie and sweat pants, and though the hood is drawn up there's also a beanie crammed on their head, because of course wigs remain so flammable.
They're busy scrutinising her, for those first few moments, before she asks what she does and Tsubasa says, "oh, shit, really is you." THEY STILL WEREN'T SURE?!
Beat.
Tsubasa ends up answering her question by stepping up to her and wrapping her up in a tight hug, which might not be a 'yes' but is clearly some measure of implicit consent. The reason why they're not doing things in the right order is revealed with Tsubasa's choked breath, as they bury their face against her shoulder. "What the fuck, man?" They ask, and the worst part is it's not even clear what part they're asking about.
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
Wigs remain flammable. Maybe they can find a wig that isn't flammable. At least the binder's intact.
But Tsubasa finally gets it and, "YEAH it's me," Ichika starts, and then she is hugged. It's definitely good enough for Ichika, who wraps her arms around her best friend and squeezes. "Tsubasa-kun," she starts, and she was so worried, and--
And...
"Yeah," she agrees. "It's all bullshit. I can't believe it. ...No, I guess I can. But it sucks. And I'm not going to let them--"
Pause.
"Wait, do you mean the green and shit?"
"That's the Dark Hour," Ichika says. "Only lasts about an hour. It'll be fine."
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
Yeah, that's definitely Ichika.
She tries to address the fuck what is, though, and Tsubasa just replies: "What the fuck?!"
They straighten up to grasp Ichika's shoulders, gaze wild, as one hand punches out a gesture towards the television and then the window. "Seriously what the fuck, man?! This is horror movie shit, it ain't FINE!"
They shake her, insistently. "THERE'S BLOOD IN THE TOILET," they all but bellow, aghast.
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
"It will be though," Ichika insists, staring down at Tsubasa. "Like."
How to explain...
"Yeah, it's horror movie shit, but it goes away in about an hour. And then it's normal again." Pause. "And then it comes back. The next night."
"So yeah this is why I avoid being out around midnight...?"
Maybe tying it to something Tsubasa already knows will help. Either way, she's being shaken!!!
...And Tsubasa sure doesn't remember the last time they were in it, it looks like.
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
"IT COMES BACK?!"
oh no she made it worse
"So that's why -- what the fuck -- what the fuck --" Tsubasa staggers back one step, two, and then their calves hit the back of the couch and they fall back onto it on a way which is really more a rare case of good luck that they tripped over something good to fall on than anything.
They sure don't remember. They definitely didn't feel how horrific it was like they are, now, either.
"What the fuck," Tsubasa says, again, holding their head in their hands as their elbows prop up on their knees.
"Okay, no, fuck, I'm cool," that's a lie, they wouldn't be breathing half as fast if they were, "horror hour I just completely never knew about gonna fuck me up goin' outside every night from now 'til forever I'm normal about it I'm SO fuckin' normal about it what the fuck. No, like, it's cool, it's cool, man. Shit's just green and all the water turned to blood. Reskinned reality, whatever. I mean, at least there aren't really monsters out there, like, can you imagine how fucked up it'd be if I'd really answered the door and some headless fuckwit had removed mine?"
oh no they're making it worse
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
What the fuck, Tsubasa says, and Ichika winces. "Uhhhhhh," she starts.
They are not cool.
"Uhhhhh."
"Sorry. I uh..."
"I reacted about as badly my first time," she admits. "But the bright side is most people don't have to deal with it. Most people just... turn into coffins and shit, for the whole thing, don't notice anything's weird."
Pause.
"And the monsters don't bug you if you stay indoors."
"I mean..."
"...We don't know why it happens, but now you've got powers that can protect you from it...?"
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
"Wait -- so, like, I was -- fuckin' -- a coffin? This whole time?" That, if anything, seems to freak Tsubasa out more. "What the fuck."
They just kind of keep repeating, "what the fuck, what the fuck," for a bit, rocking back and forth on the couch. Just... give them a minute.
There it is! They reach out for her, in the green-tinged darkness, as they straighten up. "Right, that whole, fuckin'... hood thing I was wearin'. And the -- weird house bird whatever the fuck." They pause. "Wait."
Tsubasa looks to Ichika, still aghast.
"Does that mean you have a house haunting you too."
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
"Yeah," Ichika says. "...I guess? That's what happens to normal people. They don't notice anything."
Ichika walks around over to the couch, but stays standing for the moment--until Tsubasa reaches out for her, and then Ichika moves to take a seat next to them. But the hook thing, the house... bird...
"No," Ichika says. "I got like... this cool ogre lady? She's got big horns and she's pretty and she smashes things and heals people."
"Everybody who's got one is different. I dunno why. It's called... 'Persona'."
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
"Wait, so there are two of you?" Tsubasa looks surprised to hear that, having apparently convinced themself that they were Just Seeing Things back then.
"But... Persona, huh." Tsubasa sighs, their weight pitching sideways to lean on Ichika like a building which has just straight given up. "I didn't think 'bout how it'd burn my prints... man, I feel like a real dick makin' everyone think I was toast. Haven't had much time to sit with it..."
They look down. "So, like... this somethin' I can use with my father, or..."
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
"Yep," Ichika answers. "Yeah. I mean, she's got a cool kimono and stuff and I have like, armor, but..."
Persona. Ichika supports Tsubasa with an arm, tilting her head her way and thinks about it. But, "You did what you had to do. It's good to keep your identity secret and shit. Especially if, like us, you might do stuff that's not legal with it..."
A pause, and Ichika says gently, "...Not so much. You can only use it in like, special places, special times. When supernatural shit is out."
"...But you probably don't wanna set your dad on fire or something anyway, even if... I'd be tempted, you know?"
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
"Yeah... guess I'm a real bona-fide crim now I'm hidin' from the cops an' shit, so I'd better have magic powers no one knows 'bout." If only Tsubasa could brag about that properly. It's just... kind of depressing.
"'Supernatural', huh... seriously like some kinda movie." Tsubasa sighs, their shoulders sinking. "I dunno, man. If I'd just done the same thing to my mom, that never woulda happened to me... it's easy to say brave shit when ya ain't burnin' alive. An'... he's gonna be mad. Y'know? Even if they ain't said my name, they might as well... everyone's gonna be lookin' at him. He'll be mad."
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
"I guess," Ichika answers of magic powers. It is kind of depressing, huh? "...I've got a lot to catch you up on, with what's been going down."
But, "Yeah. It's really weird shit, too. It's not mostly serial killers setting everybody on fire, but that happens too."
Pause. "...You didn't, though. You did say the brave shit. You didn't turn it back on your mom, even though..."
"God, that's so fucked up," Ichika says, remembering--feeling. "Yeah, he'll be mad. ...But you just keep being you, you know?"
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
"Shit," Tsubasa swears, "I fuckin' bet."
Then they stop, and tilt their head to side-eye Ichika from where they're leaning.
"Wait you said 'serial killers' with an 's' sound that's plural that means there's more than one how many god damn serial killers Boss."
Okay, maybe they're not completely done being freaked out.
They sigh, though, and their head rests against her shoulder with a troubled expression. "She said she loved me," they say, their voice a touch more hollowed now. "Said it wasn't my fault. And I just keep thinkin'... like... had she done it already? Or did she do it 'cuz I yelled at her? ... mighta been I brought it on myself."
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
"Uhhhh," Ichika says again, unladylike. "Like, at least two I guess? That bitch who showed up with the Joker Killer, and the Joker Killer, and that psycho with the axe from the bomb shelter, and..."
More than there should be!!
"..."
"Sounds like she did it and felt guilty," Ichika says, a little hollowly too. "...What else wouldn't have been your fault, you know?"
"...Youc an't brin something like that on yourself because it's fucked up. Nobody deserves that. Not even she deserves that, after doing it to you."
"...That's what you decided, right? That you wouldn't put yourself on that level."
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
"What the fuck," Tsubasa's going to be saying that a lot, don't worry about it.
The most what the fuck thing of all, though, is something they have trouble speaking so harshly about. At least -- they did.
"Guilty, huh... maybe. But she coulda warned me." Anger creeps into Tsubasa's voice, quietly, as they add: "Or, like, protected me? Ever? If I had set the pyro killer on her she'd fuckin' deserve it, like what the fuck coulda he done woulda been worse than killin' me, even if she insists on puttin' up with it, God forbid she ever bother puttin' up with shit to help me out --"
Tears choke out their anger, though, and they feel totally lame shifting towards Ichika and latching a hand around her but they're really angry because they're scared as hell. "I can't kill her, man, she's my mom," they sniffle, wretchedly, "but what the fuck am I gonna do, man? My father hates losin', hates losin' face more, an' I'm runnin' blind out here, he's gonna try again an' I'm jus'... fuck!"
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
Ichika's gonna worry about it.
"Yeah," Ichika says. "...She could've done any of those things. She failed you. ...Shit's bad for her, but you should've been what mattered. Who mattered." Ichika is still evolving how she feels... but that seems the important part, to her. That Tsubasa matters. That your child matters.
"I don't know," Ichika admits. "I don't know how we get around that, but..."
"But they tried to kill you and it didn't take. That's something, right?"
"Whatever happens, I'll be here, OK? ...I'm not gonna make you go through this alone."
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
"If she knew it was bad, she shoulda took us an' left," Tsubasa scowls. How they feel is -- complicated, but -- right now, the thing they really need to feel is angry. "Shoulda thought 'bout what he'd do to us, too. Was all well 'n good for her, she got to zonk out on pills all fuckin' day... fuck, bet she's high as a kite right now." Beat. "Uh, before the horror show, anyway."
Tsubasa sighs, though, shaking their head. "... guess that's cuz he wouldna took it well more than regrettin' me, tho'." Why would she be that worried about a child she wanted dead when he'd probably gone into a rage over how she did it?
"This is big shit, man," Tsubasa says, dismally. "Like... the Joker Killer came to kill me... an' the cops pinned his shit on me. I'm gettin' hunted for my own fuckin' assassination, man. If my father can make 'em act like that... he can prolly just get away with murder. It's stupid, like... I figured I was done with dyin', but he don't give a shit 'bout that, do he?"
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
"Yeah," Ichika agrees. Angry is right, from Ichika. So why does it hurt to pile on like that? "Yeah. What he did to you..."
But, Ichika doesn't know about the rest. The Joker, though...
"I dunno," Ichika says. "If he could just get away with killing you outright, wouldn't he have done that by now?"
"...STill fucked though," Ichika admits. "I'm sorry. ...It shouldn't be like this."
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
If Tsubasa were thinking a little more straight, they'd realise where their splash damage was going, but...
Well, their head's just not that clear.
"For some fuckin' reason he wanted to put her up to it," Tsubasa shrugs their free shoulder, "an' prolly she didn't know no way to kill a guy other than the rumour. Now he's done his stupid loyalty test or whatever the fuck it was... now's when I get to deal with him."
Tsubasa curls in, a little more, as if they could become a small ball and disappear. "He hit me," they say, and it hurts that they can remember when that was the worst thing he'd done. "So maybe he'd just... do it himself. He's friends with cops, so he can get a gun... just grab me, one day, an'... I guess these stupid powers won't mean nothin' then."
Snif. "It oughtna be," they whine, "so why is it with me?! S'not fair. I'm fuckin' scared, man!"
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
"...Mm." Some reason...
But Ichika hugs Tsubasa, listening and then saying, "...It's not fair," she agrees.
"But you're not alone, OK? You've got me. You've got Yeo-san. ...A bunch of people showed up and tried to help. The shit they said when they thought you were gone..."
"It mattered. You matter."
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
"It was so weird, man," Tsubasa says, their voice strained from the weight of all that crying. "People were mad... or cryin'... or jus' fuckin' shook... an' it were 'bout me. Even those dudes in masks I didn't fuckin' know, like? My folks keep tryin' their fuckin' best to teach me how -- worthless I am, but -- but all those guys, everyone was so fucked up 'bout it."
They take a breath. "So... so... yeah, I can't, like, say I'm on my own 'bout it or nothin'. Not just 'cuz yer runnin' with me, but they won't put up with it, neither... yeah?"
Tsubasa latches on a little tighter. "Sorry," they say. "Ya been sayin' that forever. Jus' -- it's jus' a lot -- y'know? But... but I saw ya diggin' through the fuckin', like, fire rubble, man..." Another sniffle.
"It's jus'... I feel safer here," they say, and they don't mean the safehouse just now, "so I really started thinkin' 'bout it, an'... yer right, it's fucked up, man..."
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
'Weird' is a word for it, and Ichika kind of hates in the moment that it's the one that seems most appropriate to Tsubasa. 'Weird' that people would care so much. "Your parents are wrong," Ichika confirms.
"...yeah," she says. "All those people give a shit. Not just me."
Ichika holds onto Tsubasa, and remembers digging through... She looks down at her hands, still sore. There's some bandages on them, if Tsubasa happens to look.
"I couldn't take it," she says. "The idea that you were dead, I..."
"Yeah. It's really fucked up."
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
They don't expect it, so they aren't used to it. There's a reason they went straight for describing life as 'kill or be killed'...
... even if they opted for the latter by exclusion.
Tsubasa reaches over, to cradle one of her hands in theirs. (There are plenty of bandages across their body; but of course there would be, given they were thrown into a burning building. That still would have hurt before they Awakened.) "You're burned," they say, sadly. Her pretty hands were hurt on their account...
"I-I'm really lucky you're runnin' with me," Tsubasa says, tears wobbling at their voice. "Shit, man... I woulda been way fucked up if it were you... can't imagine how it was like goin' through it. I-I'm sorry, man. I didn't... wanna die an' leave you in the lurch."
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
Ichika is surprised by that motion, but she lets her hand be taken. "Oh, I ..."
"I'll be OK," Ichika says. "Just a little." Thanks to her Persona, she won't even scar... but until she heals, it does hurt.
But Tsubasa...
"It's not your fault," Ichika says. "...It's..."
"It's hard," she says. "Feeling like we're in this world, cast around by whatever happens..."
"But.."
"I want to believe we can do something, anyway. You know?"
"I'm lucky, too. You're alive, after all."
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
Tsubasa's fingers rest on Ichika's wrist, rather than risking aggravating the burns on her palm. "... thanks," they say, quietly.
But she's lucky, too, and Tsubasa actually smiles when they hear that. "Y--yeah," they nod, looking back up to her. "Hard not to feel like there's nothin' I can do... but... if I can jus' figure it out, I can do somethin' 'bout it, right? Like -- I got this Persona, whatever -- I can do shit, too. We ain't just... powerless."
It's different, the way they say: "Gotta be somethin' I can do."
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
Tsubasa smiles, and Ichika smiles back. "Yeah," she says. "We're just starting, right? ...It's not over at all."
"We can do shit, together."
"...I'm sure of it. There is something."
"..."
Ichika leans back on Tsubasa. "Yeah..."
<Pose Tracker> Tsubasa Seki has posed.
"Together... yeah," Tsubasa smiles, and their harsh features really soften quite a bit, when they actually do. "They'll be sorry they messed with us. We're tough as steel."
They take a breath in, and sigh, their eyelids lowering. "Hey, uh... I know it's dangerous right now, but... can ya stay a bit longer? I... I really needed... to see you, I think."
<Pose Tracker> Ichika Kawase has posed.
Ichika smiles back. "Yeah."
But...
"Sure," Ichika says. "I'll stick around. ...Don't really want to leave yet, anyway."
"...I'm glad I can help, and..."
"I'm just glad you're still here."