2025-10-04: A Selfish Hope
- Log: A Selfish Hope
- Cast: Yua Ooshiro, Shinjiro Aragaki
- Where: SUNNY SIDE Diner, Hirasaka Ward, Sumaru
- OOC Date: October 04, 2025
- IC Date: July 21, 2012
- Summary: After a chance meeting with Yua while stopping a purse snatcher, Shinjiro asks her for advice about life and death, and learns a little bit about having hope in the people around you.
(|============================= Hirasaka - Main ==============================|) -=============================================== Sumaru City/Hirasaka Ward ====- The westernmost ward of the city, and also the one furthest inland, Hirasaka is considered one of the least desirable places to live in Sumaru. This is in part due to the bad reputation of local Kasugayama High School, nicknamed "Kasu High" by its students and "Cuss High" by its detractors. A school of overwhelmingly boys but some errant girls, it's said to be for delinquents, poors, and other "problem" children. Just down the street is Sumaru Prison, which is not a prison but an underground club with a live stage, and either way the parents of Sevens students hate it. It's not all bad in Hirasaka, though. The shopping is second to none, with a huge five-story mall called Smile Hirasaka that offers a wide variety of businesses and conference meeting rooms; just be sure to go on a day when the stores aren't closed. For those who want a more homey atmosphere for their purchases, there's Kameya Alley. Plenty of office buildings populate the area, too.
<Pose Tracker> Yua Ooshiro has posed.
A Mercer-Benz is far too fancy a car to have in Hirasaka; rich men crave cars just like the sleek black stallion which pulled up at the side of the road today. Out of it steps a woman who must be on her way to the Tokyo Ballet, for she's dressed in a black dancer's leotard, complete with black pointe shoes... and a nice little black handbag slung over her shoulder.
That's terribly easy to steal, you know. It's the middle of the morning, the sun shining merrily down, but this is Hirasaka.
Yua Ooshiro steps out onto the street with the assistance of her chauffeur, and assures him of something which has him stepping back into the driver's seat and driving away. (Perhaps she means to visit for a while.) But as she walks down the street...
Disaster strikes--!!
Disaster is a purse snatcher, who grabs her handbag and bolts down the road before she has time to even cry out, "Oh--!", her painted nails pressing to her chest in alarm.
She does reach out and cry after him, at least: "Stop! Thief!!!" And she tries to hurry after him, but...
Has Yua never heard about how that leads to more crime?!
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
Shinjiro is, strangely, in a decent mood. He met Tsumugi Kujaku, who helped him figure out he needed a new lease on life without barely lifting a finger. He met with Myunghon, who he mended his relationship with and came out perhaps stronger for it. He even slept well, for once, worries briefly off his shoulders.
Now, he's walking down the street from the opposite end, where the purse snatcher is running. He can hear the words 'stop, thief', and see him coming. He's observant enough to predict where he'll go. Shinjiro shuffles lightly as if to move out of the way...
And then outstretches his leg to trip, and his arm to catch, turning casually with a tilt of a head should he succeed. "Tch, easy there. Drop it or I'll drop you."
His other hand stretches out to take the purse from him, should he prefer to run rather than fight. It does not sound like an idle threat, given the gaunt teen's standing at his full height, scowling lightly. His red leather coat is a different one from usual, with fake wolf fur lining and fingerless gloves, almost a trenchcoat in length.
Shinjiro hasn't even parsed who cried out yet. He's too busy trying to help make sure she doesn't lose her handbag.
<Pose Tracker> Yua Ooshiro has posed.
"Huh?!" The punk yelps, as he's suddenly dangling. He's angry, for a breath, snapping, "Tch, you--!"
... but he doesn't really want to introduce his face to the pavement today, so he shoves the purse roughly into Shinjiro's hand. "Take it, asshole!!"
(It's surprisingly heavy, for something of its size; she must be carrying something substantial in there, beyond her purse.)
The purse snatcher will of course bolt as soon as he's released, just in time for Yua to finish hurrying up. She is not out of breath having run down the street, notably, though she does stop when she sees Shinjiro.
"... oh! Aragaki-kun!" Yua exclaims, clasping her hands together. "You stopped him! Thank you!"
She doesn't seem all that interested in continuing to chase the purse snatcher. And why would she? Shinjiro's got her purse right there.
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
As the snatcher hands him the purse, Shinjiro makes sure it's tightly in hand before releasing him. "Bye," he simply says, before walking over to Yua with it. He pauses.
"Hey, Ooshiro. Small world," he says amicably, even if he does know they only connected more than 'teacher-student' levels of superficially over shared bonds and trauma. He reaches the purse out, not questioning what's in it just yet. Why would he, he doesn't know what women carry in those!
"This is yours. Hirasaka, huh? Coming to visit Myunghon, or something else?" He asks, looking to step aside on the sidewalk, just so he's not blocking foot traffic for even a second. A pause. "Been meaning to message you, Made some progress on helping them with food and was curious if you wanted to work together on it. I don't think they'd mind, if they confided in us both."
He's not going to hold her up too long if she doesn't want to be held up, he just knows they only meet by coincidences so far since he ditches school and wants to pass the message while he remembers.
<Pose Tracker> Yua Ooshiro has posed.
Yua takes the purse, and slips it over her shoulder again. (Shinjiro might note that she carries it hanging off of one shoulder, instead of crossing it over the opposite one, which makes it much easier to grab.) "It's all right," she shakes her head, smiling. "It's happened before... but Mimi would notice if I made a lot of big purchases with my card, anyway, so they'd really stand out!" Someone else monitors the spending she does on her card, huh...?
Yua, helpfully, steps aside too. "Yes," she smiles, warmly. "But I don't mind making a stop beforehand. Today is a day off for me, so I have the time." She can anticipate Shinjiro not wanting to keep her! "Oh, and you have? That's wonderful!" She claps her hands together. "They visited me just yesterday, you know, with some cookies they'd baked, it was so delightful. So they're really giving this food thing their all, you know?"
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
Shinjiro rubs the back of his head, nodding. "Mimi, huh? Good to have people who care," he says, assuming simply that they're a close friend or roommate or family member or something. He has no reason to suspect otherwise.
But as they both step aside, Shinjiro considers. It's her day off, but she means to talk to Myunghon... can he be selfish and ask for some of her time? She might be a good source of help for the things that he's trying to settle in his brain after yesterday. She seems... put together, despite their shared trauma, and Myunghon trusts her, after all.
But first, cookies. "Yeah, I've tried them. They were very nice... we got into an argument and made up yesterday after taking some breathing space, and they gave me some. Still trying to figure out how to make up that kindness to them..."
A pause, as Shinjiro tilts his head, looking over the places nearby to see what isn't 'literally in the street where everyone can hear. "...this might be sudden, but do you mind chatting with me for a few minutes, then? I think it's a certain kind of... fortune that this happened. I don't believe in random coincidences anymore, and I'd like advice on something I just started thinking over, besides handing you my cooking notes." He pauses for a moment, though, and it seems as if he won't be put out if she rejects.
<Pose Tracker> Yua Ooshiro has posed.
It's normal for the woman to control the finances in a relationship! Now, granted, one might look at femme Yua and think she ought to be the woman handling that, but Miho is no less a woman than she is... and Miho understands money much more than she does, too.
... especially when dealing with the kinds of money spent by rich people, a world where Yua really has no clue which way is 'up'. Everything in her present life feels too expensive to her!! It's very helpful to check with Miho to see if it's actually too expensive.
"Oh, an argument!" Yua exclaims, with sympathy. "You poor thing. Arguments are tough at your age... but it all worked out, right?"
(Don't tell Yua how bad Myunghon was taking it. Surely it's the children who struggle with interpersonal rejection and conflict.)
She smiles, sympathetically. "Of course, dear," she assures him. "Why don't we head on over to the Sunny Day?" The Sunny Day, of course, is the diner on the first floor of the Cardboard Dragon's building. "Or... would you prefer I called my car?"
She doesn't know how sensitive the things he wants to say are, after all.
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
"Yeah," Shinjiro says about the argument with a nod. "I think we're going to get along better now that we've had a chance to talk about what was bugging us." He smiles softly. It's a nice smile.
But when Yua agrees, he nods, looking over towards the direction of the Cardboard Dragon. "Let's go to Sunny Day, then. I don't want to make more of a hassle." This implies it isn't *that* sensitive, so....
When they eventually migrate over towards Sunny Day, he's quiet on the way there. Parsing his thoughts and such. When they make it to the shop, he opens the door first, before moving to take a seat in one of the booths after grabbing a menu.
"I've never actually been in here..." He says once they're seated. He's parsing how to ask his advice, as he gets out one of his mini notebooks, the one he uses for recipes, and starts by making it selfless.
"Their sensations are triggered by fats and sugars. Protein ice cubes work the best so far, though we're also trying unseasoned boiled chicken breast, made crispy and cooked in a way to reduce both of those without making it too boring. The Maillard reaction is a bad thing here, so..." He certainly knows a lot about cooking. "I think soy might be a good thing to try, or other sources of whole protein."
He passes over the recipe book to Yua, should she want to check his Myunghon section.
Then, he pauses, tilting towards his advice he wanted to ask. It's clear he's trying to find the courage. "...This is going to sound silly, but... someone said something that made me wonder if I'm trying to avoid life. Ditching school, avoiding people for a long time... at what point is it worth it to try anyways?"
Sounds really harsh for a seventeen year old to ask, but with his sort of situation and knowing that Yua might understand...
<Pose Tracker> Yua Ooshiro has posed.
"It's no hassle at all," Yua assures him. But -- the diner!!
"The croissants," and her pronunciation is flawless, "are very good!" Yua says, smiling. "Hmm, but Dr. Matsuhashi told me to eat a lot of fresh food... so I'll go with the salad."
Why would she be worried about her diet?! No reason. Don't worry about it.
She taps her finger to the side of her cheek, as she thinks. "Fats and sugars... that means Myucchi will want to avoid processed foods, too. Let me see..." She looks through his recipe book, and concludes: "... this looks good! Think about adding fibre sources like seaweed, too... they're very flavourful."
Perhaps her review will give him time to speak. She can be subtle! Sometimes.
He finally manages to speak up, though, and Yua tilts her head into her palm. "I think... it's always worth it. Because avoiding life is giving up, in a way, isn't it...? Trying to minimise your effect on the world, so you won't cause anyone harm... but people are connected, even if they have an unfortunate fate. I understand your feelings... even with Mimi fighting for me every step of the way, sometimes I feel remarkably transient. But so long as I'm alive, something could happen... and I'll be remembered when I go, regardless of whether I engaged or pulled away."
She smiles, gently. "This is something I've had to address in my own life, recently... perhaps it would help you to hear of it?"
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
The croissants are good, but she should eat salad... Shinjiro nods, wondering vaguely if she has some reason to be concerned with her intake, but it's not his business. "I'll get those, then, if you're recommending them."
He's absently looking at the menu, a fidget tool, as Yua explains processed foods. "Fibre... that's a good idea. We can see if they appreciate the flavor or not. I'll introduce it slowly the next time I experiment."
But, finally, he gets his response. Shinjiro considers what she's saying, and it doesn't make him exactly panic, but it does trigger something at a certain phrase. "Remembered when you go, huh..." He frowns a bit thoughtfully at that. "I'm only seventeen... what will there be to remember?" It sounds rhetorical more than anything, trying to process the thought of living on in memory.
Yua offers to help him with her own story, though, so he nods. "I'd appreciate that if it's not too much trouble."
<Pose Tracker> Yua Ooshiro has posed.
"Myucchi would certainly remember you," Yua points out, plainly. "Your friends from school before you had to leave them would remember you, too. Mimi and I will remember you!" There's an implicit assumption in that last one which she doesn't bother dragging out. "By seventeen, you've already affected many, many people... you are not so rootless as you may think."
She pauses, for a delicate moment; but of course any fear she has of being judged is outweighed by the fact that the playing field is hardly even, and this boy is only seventeen, for all the weight placed upon his shoulders.
"My dream was always to become my King's wife," she settles on, after a moment. "Perhaps that seems a little silly to you, since it's simply what's expected of women when they reach my age... but we will say that there's something about my situation which makes it rather less standard, at least with my own beloved." Who is presumably a man, because who's ever heard of a female King? Anyway. "Well, 'that situation' interrupted my life... but my dream remained."
She smiles, and it's still a gentle expression. "We decided we would strive to be wed and have a child," she explains, "though there is a terrible weight upon us. Leaving all else aside, I may die before my baby is grown... such a thing ought to trouble anyone. But if I delay on the thought that tomorrow is my last, my dream shall be ashes, you see? And even were I to die, as they say I shall... what I leave behind will live on."
She gestures, loosely, as she assures Shinjiro: "... of course, I'm not suggesting you do such a thing at your age. Our contexts are quite different. But a child is not all one may leave as testament... and not the only thing one may live for."
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
"I suppose," Shinjiro says noncommittally about being remembered, but he's not rejecting it. It takes time to swallow these things, as recently as he even had the realization he's grappling with.
Then, Yua explains her circumstances. To become a wife and have a child, despite her lifespan... may not even be with her spouse and child as they grow old. If Yua is expecting she may be judged, there's no sign of it.
"...congratulations. I wish you the best of luck. Hopefully your dream can bring you happiness..." he starts with, before grappling the implicit question. Is it worth to leave something behind when you die instead of running away? What can he even leave behind? His art is ephemeral, his likelihood of ever being a legal adult being so low as to be out of the question for him.
"I think the thing I'm struggling with is... death scares me. It's a frightening thing. I wonder if we're ever truly prepared. If I could have been, maybe I'd feel like I could leave something behind. But what's the point of someone like me going to school and trying to do something when all that will be left is a graduation certificate and those precious memories?"
Something he says catches on his tongue, though. Something that he turns around briefly. "Maybe that's the point, though. Maybe I'm just not selfish enough about it." It feels hard, uncomfortable to say, as if he's weighing Tsumugi's apparent philosophy of freedom against his tongue.
<Pose Tracker> Yua Ooshiro has posed.
"Thank you," Yua smiles, quite sincere. It's a relief to hear him accept it, even if she hasn't shared any of the truly scandalous details. (More scandalous than outliving her baby? ... well, yeah.)
But... death scares him, he says, and Yua reaches over the table to place her fingertips delicately on his arm. (There's a strange decoration, on the back of her right hand; a piece of fabric, stretched between ring and bracelet, covering the back of her hand.) She doesn't interrupt him, though. She just... lets him talk.
How awful, she thinks, that they would take a child, and take his future from him.
"A little selfishness can be important," she agrees, sensing in him that framing his connections as selfishness is important to him. ... besides, can she disagree? It would surely be more selfless for her to abdicate her false employment, to avoid any situation where she could betray the trust of those children who do not suspect her. Knowing her situation, she can guess at Shinjiro's situation, too. "Perhaps one day you will hurt them," she allows, given that, "but if you ease their pain ten times before you do, your efforts surely are not just in vain."
Yua sighs, as she straightens up and folds her hands in her lap, looking down. (Beneath the table, her foot taps away. Don't worry about it. Yua moves habitually to vent off steam.) "Death is frightening," she allows, her smile fading for a moment. "For me, as well. It's not that I think I'm prepared... really. Whenever I think of it, I always think... Mimi promised to find a way through. Without my faith in her, I would have rather a lot of trouble... there are still days it is amongst the weights which fix me firmly under the covers 'til I'm dragged to face the day." She shakes her head, looking up to Shinjiro. "But I cannot give up," she insists. "Perhaps they will improve their formula -- or invent some surgery -- science may have led us here, but it may too lead us through."
And another child will be sacrificed to give them that knowledge, she is sure, and does not say; does not wish to grieve him, when she is sure he knows.
Yua feels quite wretched, letting those unknown lives fall to save hers, but they will fall regardless of her need for it.
She would not walk away from Omelas; rather, she cannot.
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
As Yua reaches out to touch Shinjiro, he looks to her, but doesn't flinch. He can sense compassion, and while he's not the touchiest himself, he's never actually minded it. He notices that strange decoration, but again, who is he to pry? He has no reason to distrust her.
Shinjiro truly does see his connections as too selfish, but Yua does seem to get him to soften not just at saying it can be important, but the part about easing their pain ten times before hurting. "...heh. I see why you teach," he says vaguely, but it's positive, an attempt at praise. "...I guess I don't have to decide immediately, either. I may not have all the time in the world but I have time regardless."
As she pulls her grip back and looks down, he nods once. "You've really got someone important there, then. I'm glad you have them..."
But what of him? Who does he have...?
"...someone is trying to help me, too. I don't know if they'll be able to pull it off... I stopped having hope a long time ago. But that's the problem, isn't it? Giving up hope is deciding you're already gone."
<Pose Tracker> Yua Ooshiro has posed.
Yua's eyes widen, a little, when Shinjiro actually sees a teacher in her -- though her expression softens, after that moment of surprise. "That's right," she encourages him. "Let yourself acclimatise to the idea. There's no need to rush."
She nods, as well, when Shinjiro recognises how important Miho is. "Mm-hm!" She hums, brightly, because of course she's always cheered up thinking of how great Miho is.
"I think... it would be kind to let them help you," Yua advances, after a moment's pause, as much to make sure Shinjiro is done speaking as for any specific purpose. (It's kind of hard for her to pick up on those cues.) "For if you were to perish while avoiding them all this time, wouldn't they think of themself as a failure...? 'If only I'd tried harder, maybe I could have reached him...' I think that's the kind of thing someone would think, in that situation. It sounds like they're a kind person... aren't they?" She prompts, tilting her head, before she goes on: "... if you can't have any hope in the future, maybe it's worth having hope in someone like that, instead. Because I can tell you it is certainly worth it to rely on other people... and it is a thing which rewards you both."
She can hazard a guess, at least, to say: "Both you and Myunghon were relieved to work out your differences and make up, weren't you? Something like that is a good example of how it's good for everyone to reach out."
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
Shinjiro does see a teacher in Yua, though an idealized one. His experiences with teachers were never quite as positive as this. The adults in his life failed him, after all.
But, kindness in letting them help him... it feeds back into his selflessness complex. "...perhaps that's true. I think she would struggle with it immensely," he says, forgetting to be neutral in pronoun for a second. Kirijo... she already feels so much guilt. Couldn't he let her help him just a little bit? He put his foot in the door, saw the doctor, is taking the pills. Couldn't he try and actually talk to her at some point?
"She is a kind person, even if I don't know if she herself thinks of herself that way," he says with a nod. "I... you're right. I was seeing Myunghon as hope for a while, and our perceptions of how to feel and think hurt us both. But that doesn't mean it's bad to *have* hope because of someone."
He smiles, a bit firmly, entirely genuinely. "Thank you. I think this has helped, at least a little bit. I understand why Myunghon thinks so highly of you."
<Pose Tracker> Yua Ooshiro has posed.
"She likely would," Yua agrees, though of course she has no idea who she is.
(But really, she wouldn't be THAT surprised to hear that Shinjiro has his own rich, influential helper. That would be a pattern of three!)
Yua smiles, shaking her head. "It's a little more complicated in Myucchi's situation," she explains, delicately, "but having hope because of others isn't bad at all."
And her smile broadens, when Shinjiro affirms that she helped. "That's great!" She says, clapping her hands together. "I'm happy I could help! It's a tough situation, but let's keep moving forward regardless, okay?"
Oh no, she's encouraging him like they're both in it together.
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
Shinjiro is still smiling, and nods about Myunghon's situation being complicated. He knows a bit about it...
But when she says they'll keep moving forward, like they're both in it together, he nods. "Yeah... don't stop until it's over," he affirms, because from his understanding they ARE in it together..
It's nice to have adults he can rely on. Perhaps he isn't as alone as he used to think.