2026-08-10: Crossroads
- Log: Crossroads
- Cast: Hyousuke Suzuki, Julian Marlowe
- Where: Kasugayama High School
- OOC Date: 2026-08-10
- IC Date: Dec 19 2012
- Summary: Seeking advice about how to proceed with his college applications - or lack thereof - Hyousuke brings the topic up in one of his sessions with Julian. While no concrete solutions are reached, and many issues are left unaddressed, the fog clouding the road ahead grows a little thinner.
(|=============== Kasugayama High School - Classroom Building ================|)
-=============================================== Sumaru City/Hirasaka Ward ====-
Nicknamed "Kasu High" by its students and "Cuss High" by its detractors,
Kasugayama High School's poor reputation is reflected in the dinginess of the
building itself. It's been around since before World War II, as reflected by the
fact that its basement was used as an air raid shelter back then, so many of its
facilities are woefully out of date. Many if not most of its students are
delinquents, and the teachers turn a blind eye to all manner of bad behavior.
Its main three floors contain the school's various classrooms for its three
years of students, who are overwhelmingly boys. The boys wear a one-note teal
uniform with black buttons and a high collar, while the girls wear an equally
unexciting sailor uniform in teal with a black neckerchief and a single white
line on the cuffs and collar.
Though some girls attend, their generally rough nature and the severely unequal
numbers mean many of the male students lament their lack of dating options and
seek out girls from other schools. It has a large gym and a huge track circle
out back, and the roof is a decent place for students to hang out.
(|============================================================================|)
<Pose Tracker> Hyousuke Suzuki has posed.
Hyousuke was, like a great many other students, busy with finals. Whether it was cramming in some last-minute revisions sessions before the fated days arrived, or actually taking the dreaded tests themselves, his schedule was jam-packed with things that some of Kasugayama's less savoury elements weren't particularly keen on caring about. That was not to mention the plethora of supernatural activities he had to undertake. Mementos runs, run-ins with the New World Order, rampaging beasts and the taming thereof... It was a miracle he found the time to sleep, much less pretend to be a functioning human being.
Even so, he still found time to attend regular sessions with Julian. How much progress he made in each was debatable, and he was never entirely sure what he wanted to say going in, but he'd made a promise to at least try and be a better man than the one that had stumbled into Kasugayama all those months ago. Thinking back, it felt like a lifetime. Like the person then was a completely different beast to the one he was now. He wagered that, if he saw them in a mirror, he might not have recognised them at all.
The door creaked on its hinges, signalling his arrival as the light from the hall slowly began to spill into Julian's room. Hyousuke still seemed unsure about the entire affair, though his demeanour was not that of a wild animal lashing out at anything that got near it this time. It was tentative, yes, and still not entirely trusting. But it was more on the level of hesitance, like a stray offered shelter and sustenance by a well-meaning stranger. He stalked slowly in, clicking the door gently shut behind him, before settling into the rigmarole that had occurred again and again since he'd first submitted himself to Julian's scrutiny.
"Marlowe-sensei." Hyousuke said by way of greeting. It was a little terse, but he meant nothing by it. "Almost didn't make this one. Exams have been kicking my ass." His attempt at levity was less a genuine joke, and more an attempt at easing himself into the conversation - a measure intended to make himself comfortable, rather than Julian.
<Pose Tracker> Julian Marlowe has posed.
Students often make the mistake of thinking Exam Time means teachers have it easy. Just gotta sit in a classroom watching students doing their work. Some of them literally taking a nap, not even bothering to keep a close eye on any cheating going on. They're not doing jack, right?
Obviously there's a lot more going on behind the scenes than that, even aside from the grading, which is already a ton of work. And for Julian (who watches for cheating attempts like a hawk, by the way) there's the added workload on the counseling side of things. This is understandibly a stressful time for students in general, which translates into his schedule there being busier than usual as well.
Not that anyone could tell, looking at Julian, the personification of the stiff upper lip principle in the face of adversity. He's not having an easy time right now for a multitude of reasons, but no one would ever know by looking at him. His students especially can't know of his woes, doubly so the ones who come to him for counseling.
Which is to say that, when Hyousuke enters his office, Julian is seated at the central with placid smile and freshly brewed tea at the ready. "<Mister> Suzuki, good to see you again," he greets in that genuine way of his, far removed from the sarcastic tone of the average teacher when scolding latecomers. "I quite understand, it is indeed a busy and stressful time. I hope you've managed to hold up in that regard?" And, of course, not one to assume that anything said in the context of a session is a joking matter.
"Please, have a seat," he says only then, indicating the chair opposite his. "Fresh out of scones I'm afraid, but help yourself to some tea if you like. It's chamomile, does wonders to ease stress, mighty fine floral taste as well."
As usual, he lets the student set the pace and tone from there, no rush or judgement. Perhaps him never saying anything about 'progress' doesn't aid any worries in that regard, but on the flip side, there's never any particular pressure coming from him either.
<Pose Tracker> Hyousuke Suzuki has posed.
The pace was, at first, a little stilted. Hyousuke nodded in acknowledgement, and poured himself a mug of tea. Not much - just enough to fill it to the halfway mark - but enough to show that the hospitality was being acknowledged and appreciated. He was going to try and be polite so that he could win at counselling, which was a real and attainable goal that was in no way unhealthy. He sipped lightly once he'd finished pouring - with surprising deftness, for a Kasugayama student, especially one that looked so rough-hewn - and set the mug into his palm as he began to elaborate on why he was there.
"Kinda." Hyousuke began, pulling a face as he looked at Julian. He couldn't maintain eye contact for longer than a few seconds, though whether it was out of awkwardness, shame, or just reflexively looking away to think was unclear. He paused for a moment, collecting himself before speaking again, though even then it seemed like he was just letting the words fall past his lips rather than making an active attempt to shape them. "You know how I was talking about college before all this, and how I wasn't gonna do the entrance exams?"
He paused again, once more trying to restructure the sentence in his head. What was he supposed to say? What did Julian want to hear? What did he himself actually want to say? Intellectually, he knew he was supposed to be open and honest, but it was like pulling teeth. He had to practically drag the words from his throat, and each one spoken was painful to hear.
"I still don't think it's worth trying. It's taking all I've got just to pass *these* exams. But I got to talking with a friend about it."
Hyousuke tensed his fingers around the mug. It was do-or-die time - if he didn't say it then, when could he? When *would* he? Steeling himself and using every mote of courage he could summon, he continued on.
"She said I should try anyway. That the worst that was gonna happen was that I'd have to just take it again next time. And I know she's right, I might as well just do it. Worst thing that happens is I'm out a few yen 'cause of the train fare. But I'm... I don't know. It still feels like it'd be wrong to try."
<Pose Tracker> Julian Marlowe has posed.
Winning at counselling is perfectly possible, after all, it's an activity in which everyone's a winner just by participating! Or so Julian might phrase it. Mentally only, so as not to dissuade anyone with a competitive mind from giving it their all. Nothing to lose by maintaining a winning attitude, if you ask him. The counselor himself on chases victory in regards to those across from him at the table, he'd certainly like to see them win at life in any and every way they possibly can.
Calmly sipping his own cup of tea, Julian doesn't make a habit of seeking extended eye contact during a session when the student doesn't seek it themselves. Especially not when they seem to be actively avoiding it, as seems to be the case here. No point in guessing the reason - with patience, the words will come in due time. What, after all, would be the alternative? To just sit in silence and drink tea? Surely no one would choose to visit a counselor of their own accord just to do that.
"I remember," is his only initial response to Hyousuke's question, nothing particularly changing about his bearing. If there's anything he wants to hear, he's not about to offer any hints. This is an incomplete thought, he'll give Hyousuke all the time he needs to complete it. Only after he mentions talking to a friend about it do his eyes show a glint of expectation, and he sets down his cup. "Is that so?" ...And yet, perhaps vexingly, no more than that, leaving it all up to Hyousuke to find the words to follow once more.
"Wrong...?" Julian adjusts his monocle, frowning slightly. "I'm afraid you lost me somewhere along the way, <Mister> Suzuki. By my interpretation, you seem to have come to the conclusion that there is no harm in trying. If there is no harm, then wherein lies the wrong that you see?"
GAME: Save complete.
<Pose Tracker> Hyousuke Suzuki has posed.
Hyousuke pulled another face. He knew the question was coming but even so, he still didn't have an answer prepared. With eyes falling somewhere between consternation and wry amusement, he finally looked back up at Julian, though it didn't seem like he was looking to him. Rather, he seemed to look through him - like he was focussed on the wall behind his head, or his mind was a million miles away and focussed on something else entirely.
"Should've seen that one coming... Geez, how do I put it? It's kinda like..."
He drummed his finger son the mug, hoping for something to come to mind that he could compare it to. Nothing came to mind, but he couldn't let dead silence reign, so forced himself to say whatever fell past his lips first.
"I didn't think I'd make it this far." In the end, he resorted to telling Julian what he'd told Shinobu. The raw, honest, truth. The kind that felt like ripping his chest open and thrusting his still-beating heart into another's hands, and letting them see the visceral parts kept hidden in the depths of his soul.
"Always thought that I was gonna end up this dumb little asshole doing shit jobs just so I'd stay alive a little bit longer. Figured I'd keep doing that until... Well, until I *wasn't* alive, I guess. But then I got thrown in here. Now I've got a teacher that's helping me get my act together, my friends are supporting me, I'm- I'm actually *passing* my exams." Cs were nothing to write home about for many, but it only took one glance at his academic records during previous years to see just how monumental consistent mediocrity was for a person like Hyousuke.
"But then I look at how far I've still got left to go, and it just... it feels like I've done a whole lot of nothing. Like..." Hyousuke clenched his teeth, straining both mind and body as he attempted to think in the abstract, and construct an analogy that might actually have made sense. "Imagine you were climbing out of a hole in the ground. You keep going up and up and suddenly there's- there's this *light* up there. And- and it makes you feel like you're actually *going* somewhere. But then you get over it, and suddenly, all it's doing is reminding you just how far you gotta keep climbing just to catch up with everyone else. I'm still a dumbass, I've still got no goals aside from just making it to tomorrow, and even if I did get in, I- I wouldn't even know what I was supposed to *do* there."
His face settled, but less in the way of someone calming down. It was like the muscles in his face all lost strength at once, and he hadn't the energy to pick them up again, save for a weak smile worn like a mask.
"Might not lose anything, but I'm not getting anything either. Just... just gonna remind me that I'm still just *me.*"
<Pose Tracker> Julian Marlowe has posed.
Julian of course knew exactly what he was doing, putting the ball back in Hyousuke's court. It was obvious there was more to tell, and he wasn't about to respond before he'd heard the entire story, in whatever way it was deemed appropriate to tell it. As only appropriate for an activity where you win just by participating, there are no wrong ways to go about it. What way Hyousuke deems appropriate, that's what really matters.
And in that regard, he is pleasantly surprised. He doesn't show it, or indeed much of any emotion, until he starts taking a positive tone about the help he's been getting, a small smile appearing not quite at the point of a teacher helping him, but at hearing more of the support of his friends. Honesty is always refreshing, but all too often the value of the most important aspects get underestimated, even overlooked. For someone who doesn't think he has his act together, Hyousuke's situation is looking better than many others', from his point of view.
Though he doesn't interrupt Hyousuke's words, he does nod a number of times, in a thoughtful way. Not meaning to exactly affirm what is being said, but meaning to spur him on to keep speaking his mind freely. Only once the energy falls away from those words does Julian hook into things.
"It is important to see that light at the end of the tunnel. But it is just as important to not stare directly at it." He idly stirs his tea spoon, as he directs his gaze to his cup. "You are not mistaken that the road to change can be quite a long one indeed. Taking that first step, seeing your initial successes, those are important milestones, worthy of pride in how far you've come. But the future is nebulous, is it not?"
Letting go of his spoon, he folds his hands together in front of him, resting him on the table as he directs a wry smile in Hyousuke's direction. "Suzuki-san," he begins, purposely switching address. "Would I be correct in assuming that you believe that in order to be a successful adult, you need to have a solid grasp of how life works, and what you want from it? Because let me tell you right now, this is entirely false. Believe it or not, but I quite frequently have no idea what I'm doing."
He pauses to allow Hyousuke a moment to react, before letting out a chuckle. "That's right. The secret is that there is no secret. There is no one correct path, no foolproof plan to reach one's goals. What's important is that you have goals - the will to attempt improving things that you wish would improve. Even if the road there seems long, as long as you have the determination to reach your intended destination, it really matters little if you are unsure how far you have yet to go, or end up taking a few detours along the way. No path is more correct than any other, you will find your way there if you persevere."
He takes a moment to sit back, calmly taking a sip of tea, before his expression turns serious. "...But perhaps I'm overlooking an important element in all this. Tell me, Suzuki-san. To what degree do your worries relate to your... extracurricular activities?"
That sure isn't generally a topic he can broach in a session. But at the Kuzunoha Detective Agency, it was made clear that Julian knows more than most of what goes on, on the supernatural side of things. Being aware of Hyousuke's involvement in this as well, it's hardly a topic he could pretend not to be a possible factor here. Though he holds up a hand, clarifying, "I don't seek to dissuade you from anything, mind. I am merely curious how you fare at balancing all the different aspects of your life."
<Pose Tracker> Hyousuke Suzuki has posed.
Julian's advice was not met with a nod, or a cocked brow, or anything that signified a sudden revelation. Instead, he met it with a small, wry, chuckle. It was devoid of any kind of mirth or amusement - rather, it was a dry and joyless thing, given more as a recognition of something uncanny.
"She said the same thing. My friend." It was part of why he'd asked her, after all. She didn't know what she was doing either. To his mind, she seemed to be stumbling through life, figuring things out a step at a time and hoping for the best. "Ended up telling me to come here and talk to you, and now you're telling me the same thing." Again, there was no mirth, but no resentment or resignment either. It was merely a recognition of a fact, in the same way that one might remark on there being rain two days in a row.
He had other things to say, but kept them down until Julian had finished speaking. Better to save his questions for the end, he reckoned, rather than interject every so often. When Hyousuke did listen to the end, however, he found himself pondering the very same question. Bereft of an answer, he looked away thoughtfully, his face scrunching a little as he began to weigh it all up. And it felt odd. For one of vanishingly few times in his life, Hyousuke wished to be open and honest with someone, hoping that they might root around in the mess that formed his mind, and help him reorganise it into something he could work with. But what was he supposed to tell Julian? That he spent every night hunting down supernatural beasts for money and strength? That he had dragged a mutt to some extradimensional space, and begged the owner for help in keeping it safe?
That, despite the litany of injuries he'd taken and the trauma he'd suffered, Achilles lending his strength to Hyousuke had been what had made him truly feel alive?
Unable to give an honest answer, Hyousuke bobbed his head from one side to the other.
"I'm balancing it alright." He said. It wasn't a lie. Not in its entirety. He recognised that what he did was not healthy, and was supremely dangerous at times, but he was alive and stumbling forwards. So he was balancing things alright. "I only really go there when they got cases I can work anyway. Most of the time it's just regular detective stuff, and I ain't got a license or the brains for that kinda thing."
"...You talked about a road, and persevering, and stuff. Earlier, I mean."
There'd been a pause before Hyousuke had spoken again. Though only a few seconds long, the tension he felt dragged it out into eternity, with every iota of it rife with thoughts storming through his mind. "But I didn't think I'd make it onto the road. And now that I am, I don't even know where I'm supposed to take it. It just... it feels like everyone's telling me to keep moving forward, but I don't know where forward *is.* I don't know what I'm supposed to want, or do, or feel, and I don't know what I'm supposed to *do* about it. Everyone's got goals and places they want to be, and things they want to do, but I've got nothing, and I don't know how I'm supposed to get *something.*"
And then a slow, creeping, realisation dawned on him, once the thoughts became words, and the words made the thoughts concrete in his mind rather than vague fragments of a notion.
They weren't just moving on.
They were leaving him behind.
<Pose Tracker> Julian Marlowe has posed.
"Ah, truly? Sounds as if your friend has an adult's wisdom." Julian lets out another pleasant chuckle, feeling as if he may have met this friend of Hyousuke's, perhaps most recently at that very Agency. "Maybe they should be the one sitting in this chair."
He says it jokingly, but there are certainly times he does feel that anyone with enough life experience and the will to help people could do this job. But that's not exactly a thing to get into in the middle of a session. Or with anyone else, ever.
Though, perhaps not everyone would have as keen a sense for when someone isn't telling the whole truth. Julian's instincts are telling him that much when Hyousuke claims to be 'balancing it alright', though if you asked him, vague affirmative phrasing like that should make anyone suspicious. Not that he needed instincts for this one. He knows Hyousuke's habits better than this, that fighting style alone speaks so many volumes it could fill multiple sessions all on its own. ...But that, in turn, is something he can't let on about knowing. So, the other type of inference will have to be the limit.
"...I see. Well, so long as that's truly the case. What you said earlier about 'just staying alive a little longer' gave the sense of a struggle for survival, if you don't mind my saying so. I have no wish to pry in that regard, but if those sorts of thoughts or situations continue to interfere with your day-to-day life, it is easy to imagine one's perspectives would turn more somber as a result." He raises his arms slightly in a gesture of helplessness. "I may not be able to identify exactly, but should you wish to go into detail about that, now or in the future... please don't hesitate."
Doesn't feel great, not being able to use all the material you have access to... nor to put the initiative for those matters on Hyousuke, knowing very well there's no way he could talk about that stuff in such great detail. He can sure say all that with the straight face of someone who doesn't know any better, all the same.
The part that Hyousuke continues with, that he can say a little more about. Raising a finger, he points out, "Did you notice? You said 'supposed' in there no less than four times. Suzuki-san, you are not supposed to do anything. I understand the perceived pressure of what is 'expected' of you quite well, but please, take these words to heart: the only right path for you is the one you decide for yourself. And if you have no idea what path that is right now? That's alright too. You don't need to make any major plans for the future, all at the same time. All you need is a single next step. Something concrete, something within your interests, something that feels attainable."
A hand goes to his chin. "Dare I suggest... a club activity? Something to spark the imagination, show you a way of doing things that you may not have considered before...?" He clears his throat, looking momentarily embarrassed as he straightens his tie. "At the risk of being called a 'shill' for this... have you seen the school newspaper? I happen to be its sponsor, at Ichika Kawase's request. Might I suggest you speak to her about it? Not necessarily to join, mind. I simply feel that, if you talk to one your own age who very recently found a new path for herself, you might gain new insight in how such things can come to be. I freely admit my advice can come across as a little too theoretical at times, so what say you to a practical example?"
<Pose Tracker> Hyousuke Suzuki has posed.
"...It's complicated. Not something I really like thinking about." Was about the extent of what Hyousuke cared to say regarding a struggle for survival. Not an outright denial, but it it cleared little up. It asked more questions than it answered, really. Of course, if Julian were so inclined, he could glance at Hyousuke's file and gain some insight. He hadn't transferred to Kasugayama, after all. He'd been put there on probation. As it stood, however, the man himself was disinclined to spill any great secrets. He didn't distrust Julian as much as before, but there was a long way to go before he told an adult and authority figure the whole story.
And there it was. The earlier remark about nobody knowing where to go or what to do had done little to budge his mindset. It was something he'd heard before, after all, and to little avail. And, perhaps to some degree, he knew there was merit in striving for something of one's own volition, and seizing control of one's own life. He was friends with two Will of Rebellion users, after all - it was a little hard not to let some of them rub off on him. But hearing the words said, and being forced to confront the reality of his own... that stunned him like a hammer blow.
Still reeling, Hyousuke couldn't think of anything meaningful to say when Julian suggested looking into clubs. There was plenty he could have remarked on, of course, but trying to organise his thoughts was like trying to grab pages from a howling tempest and order them on the spot. It was all he could do to nod dumbly and mumble acknowledgement of Julian's ideas, never mind offer any kind of significant response to them. But, in the end, he managed to force his thoughts into some kind of order. Though still scattered, there was enough order to manage a coherent response.
"I'm gonna stick with Muto-sensei's training until I graduate. It's... It's been good for me. Gives me something to focus on." Muto-sensei was, of course, a PE teacher at Kasugayama that moonlit as a martial arts instructor. A stone-faced man with ash-grey hair, he seemed as old and rugged as the Earth itself, with a voice as deep and booming as a thunderclap. It was no secret Hyousuke took lessons from him - a fair few students could attest to his effective, if uncompromising, methods. "...But you're right. I think maybe I should talk with Ichika-san. She might have some ideas about what to do about all... this."
"Dunno if I'll get the chance to do it before break. But I'll keep it in mind. Thanks."
Hyousuke's words were fired out at a staccato pace, voice rigid and tone uneven. But he was no less genuine for it, no matter how stilted it all sounded. Then, out of nowhere, he spoke again. "Just something concrete..." He muttered, clearly more as a thought to himself he hadn't realised he'd spoken. But a quiet, private, breakthrough was still one nonetheless.