2025-09-15: When the Cicadae Cry
- Log: When the Cicadae Cry
- Cast: Shinjiro Aragaki, Myunghon Yeo
- Where: Naganaki Shrine -> A Cafe, Tatsumi Port Island
- OOC Date: September 15, 2025
- IC Date: July 11, 2012
- Summary: Shinjiro has some exceptionally poor news to drop on Myunghon, who doesn't take it well. When the cicadae cry...
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
It is early evening in Tatsumi Port island, the day after Shinjiro returned to SEES. He's been doing... alright, even if he's still tense about having talked to Umie that one night, and his whole return in general.
When Myunghon texted they would meet up, he texted a place. Bringing them to the dorm wasn't an option, so...
He's standing at Naganaki Shrine, overlooking the sacred tree. No one else is here. His hands are clasped in prayer, eyes closed. He's still coatless, wearing only his gift beanie for warmth and occasionally shivering, but his ninja injuries are starting to heal.
Should he tell Myunghon, he asks himself? Do they deserve that much from him, as his friend and employer? Or should he make it easier on them and let them not know until it's too late, which he doesn't understand is worse? He hasn't decided, but at the least, he can talk with them, maybe take them somewhere fun later. He's already eaten, just to be courteous and not insist on going out to eat somewhere. As much as he adores the chef at Hagakure, it wouldn't be a good spot for them.
He takes three short breathes. And then... exhale.
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
Myunghon is already waiting for Shinjiro by the time he arrives, having seated themself under one of the playground swings with their legs already tucked up -- there's a little cuteness in the way the swing gently sways and yet completely fits their fetal form, perhaps, but also...
They have a thick black parasol propped up to block the sun?
They're so sleepy they don't notice Shinjiro arriving and going for his prayer at the shrine proper, but something jolts them from their half-lulled state and they look around again. It's almost easy to miss Shinjiro without his coat, but the beanie is a good second tell. If he lost both, Myunghon would truly struggle to identify him.
"Shinjiro-ssi," they call to him after they're satisfied his quiet moment of prayer and introspection is over.
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
Shinjiro hadn't even noticed them. He feels sheepish, rubbing the back of his head as he hears their call. Stepping over to the swings, he looks for a place to sit, and decides to take the swing next to them.
"Sorry, missed you there. How was the trip?"
He shivers lightly again, but doesn't address it, instead lightly swinging.
"I'm all set up in the dorm. Room was how I left it, broke in their kitchen, seasoned the cast ironss... think I've done enough for them yet?" he teases. He knows he hasn't.
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
The sun gets a little stronger as the clouds pass, and Myunghon flinches a little and tucks the parasol a little closer as they, too, shiver, but possibly for completely opposite reasons. It might be nicer for Shinjiro with the warm sun bearing down from the cloud cover.
"What happened to the coat...?" Myunghon asks gently. "Was it damaged...? I could arrange for a spare, but I imagine SEES would clothe you as well." There's a pause, and they visibly don't like thinking of SEES, clearly, and latches onto his words about the dorms.
The room was as he left it... there's something very sad about that. Something sixteen to eighteen year olds probably shouldn't. None of all this...
"Hmmm... the kitchen at the safehouse was adequate, I believe, but I imagine a little basic for the kind of skills you have. Have you cooked anything for them yet?"
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
"Street ninja with a Persona. Summoned bridges and shit," Shinjiro sums up for Myunghon as if it isn't the most insane thing in the world. "He put me in the hospital, which was his goal. I checked myself out as soon as possible, don't worry." LIKE THAT'S WHAT TO WORRY ABOUT
But he notices the dislike of SEES, frowning. "Sorry," he says, before thinking about the next question.
"Oh, the safehouse kitchen was good, but this has Kirijo money. I can use two pans at once, so that's nice." A pause. "I don't know if I'm comfortable with that yet. I barely know most of them, Aki wouldn't take my food seriously unless it was unseasoned chicken, and cooking just for Kirijo feels weird, you know?"
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
"... oh, him," Myunghon murmurs, since it isn't the most insane thing in the world because they've engaged with Shiryuu. "He's one of my customers... but..." Wait, what?!?!?!? Their eye widens slowly as Shinjiro admits he was checked into the hospital. "His-- goal? No, that makes sense... the other one..." Myunghon's fisheyeing for a moment, before frowning deeply as Shinjiro says he made sure to check out as quickly as possible.
"As long as you're sure. If I worry, you'll just tell me I'm a hypocrite who jumped out of the third story window," Myunghon mumbles, knowing Shinjiro's got their number.
They take into regard what he talks about cooking for others... "Aki was... that young man with the short white hair and the boxing stance? Unseasoned chicken... would that work for me?" Myunghon tries to recall. Now it's come to mind. There's a genteel little smile, even as they try to cradle the parasol so that they're not exposed to any sun. "Sorry, I'm not trying to block you out, but the sun was making me feel very faint..."
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
"..." Shinjiro pauses. "What do you know about him? I didn't even get a name, and I'm sure we're going to fight again." He takes a breath. "If you can share, I mean."
But about the hospital visit... he finally frowns. "I've... been a bigger hypocrite than anyone else. Worry if you want."
Seasoned chicken, though, he thinks as he swings... "Yeah, that's him. He can't appreciate food because it's all about fitness for him. You, though... it might work, depends on what meat does to that sensation you get. We can try it?"
A sharp frown. "We can go inside somewhere if you want. You don't have to hang out here just for me, Myunghon."
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
"He is searching for someone. Atop a hill in Sumaru City... when you bring a 'certain artifact' there, when the correct rites are performed... you can summon 'Shinigami'," Myunghon explains. A somewhat droopy little smile. "Sounds an awful lot like a way to awaken to a Persona... regardless, he's searching for the person who originally found out about this. Then he tried to hurt me."
A pause, and then the swing sways a bit more gently, and the clouds take over again. There's a sigh of relief as Myunghon sets the parasol down. "We concluded that fight by making each other so nauseous we both had to throw up."
Shinjiro says it's fine to worry if they want to, and Myunghon sighs as they protest, almost So-young like, "It just isn't the same anymore if I have *permission*."
Do they want to try unseasoned chicken? "We can try it... we know fat triggers the sensation, but someone like this Aki would like it because it is pure protein."
This is going to be the hellgate to how overcooked dry chicken breast is just PERFECT for Myunghon.
"No. This shrine is nice. These swings are nice. It's nostalgic for... something I never had."
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
"...this sounds like Rumor nonsense," Shinjiro admits. "Wonder what I had to do with it. Felt like he wanted me out of the way. But for what?"
The nausea fight gets an eyebrow raise, before they get into the worrying. He frowns. "...I get it. I..." He doesn't know what he was going to say, and trails off. How could he ever worry this person? It hurts his heart, and the frown he makes shows the contemplative, sad mood he's getting.
But, about the food, he continues. "Yeah, got it. I'll see how bland I can make it without making the texture boring later, bring you some samples next time I'm in Sumaru."
Nostalgia for something one never had... "I didn't have it either until I moved into the dorms the first time. Never been much of a person who prays. But it's felt like time to pray lately. So many things on my plate. Some just aren't going away."
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
"Shinjiro-ssi, I am currently desperately trying to hide from the sun because I apparently was careless enough to be afflicted by one," Myunghon has to point out on the topic of whether it's nonsense or not. A pause. "I wonder if sunscreen would work... do vampires wear sunscreen? Some of them are just literally blocks for your skin, are they not?"
"Regardless of whether it is true or not, he believes it sincerely, which means that there is, even if misled, some basis of *a* truth behind it," Myunghon does murmur. "You asked me some tips on how to become a Rumourmonger once, and understanding that truth is a separate matter from fact is part of it."
They're trying to natter, because that's a little better than nursing the clearly worn and wounded expression they're trying to hide, and being more worried about Shinjiro at that. "Do you want my coat, for now? It'd be far too small for you, but... it may be better than shivering."
Some things just aren't going to go away...
"The enma will ultimately judge everything we have done, when we have paid our six mon and crossed the Sanzu River," Myunghon remarks, perhaps uncharacteristically spiritual, just like how Shinjiro's felt like it's time to pray recently. There's something despondent and gloomy about it in them. "We cannot run away from our sins... that is why you are back here... and it isn't any different for me either."
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
"You know, fair. You *are* a vampire now. Maybe you can try it." Shinjiro teases and nods, on both that and the Rumormonger stuff. "Sorry... yeah, I'll have to keep learning about that, I think. It's still hard to grasp sometimes."
"I- I can't take your coat from you for even a minute, isn't it important to you? If you're already uncomfortable, you should keep it."
But Myunghon talks about the Sanzu River. Being judged. Shinjiro stops swinging, breathing again. He's a bit despondent and gloomy as well, but as they mention their sins...
"I never quite told you what happened, did I?" He waits a moment to think if he should continue. "Two years ago, I mean. I... I trust you enough. I think you deserve to know, if you want to."
"I understand if you'd rather not be burdened."
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
"Perhaps it is all cognition, and thus sunscreen also has power," Myunghon is actually seriously debating this. "I have not yet had a craving for human blood yet, however... so I am choosing to look at the silver lining." There is a gentle shake of their head, though. "No, do not be. I, too, am still learning. Perhaps the Palaces that are birthed out of a particularly significant distortion from shared reality is only one such 'truth' from 'fact', as well..."
They're feeling particularly chatty today. Maybe the silence was killing them earlier. Shinjiro stammers that he can't possibly take the coat from them, it's important! If they're already comfortable...
But then Myunghon rises from their swing seat, walking behind Shinjiro and draping the new Cognitive coat over his uncoated shoulders, gently. It is a comical misfit, between Myunghon's bony, wiry frame and Shinjiro's much stronger one.
"You told me there was a way out of this nightmare together... that I should be on this side with all of you. That means... you're on the same side you pulled me back too."
It is a little strange to see Myunghon without the coat. They look so much... smaller... and gaunt, as a person, with just their white dress shirt and tie starkly showing how unnourished they are.
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
The vampire stuff and Palace stuff gets a nod, as if they should try it, but then Myunghon's approaching with the coat, reminding him of what he said that one time. Shinjiro's heart hitches in his throat as they give it to him, wrapping it over his shoulders. Even if it's not the best fit, it's still warmer than it was... so he's appreciative, and it shows. "...thank you."
But their words... he'll take that as license to continue, because now he feels guilty they care about him like this. There's no way out of his nightmare, even if he said that with hope in his heart. The report from the doctor confirmed that. "...SEES began in middle school. Just the three of us, unable to even clear a single floor of Tartarus, but we'd do patrols during the Dark Hour. One night, a strong Shadow was in the residential district." A pause, breathing.
"I lost my control of my Persona. It went berserk, and... crashed into a house. A woman, a single mother, Mrs. Amada, was killed. Her son..." Myunghon knows more or less the rest there, after that talk the other day.
A breath. "Sorry, I'm going too fast. I just... I don't want to be a further burden to you. I..."
He trails off. A single touch of truest kindness from a person he respects has unraveled him a bit.
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
Soundtrack: n/a
It's summer.
The cicadae noise around the woods of the shrine is the primary noise.
Myunghon gently pushes on Shinjiro's back, and the creak of the child-sized swing can be heard in sharp contrast to the background as Shinjiro explains. The shot is focused on the swing chains for three seconds.
They're not sure why they did that; it just feels like an innocent little activity that isn't weighed down by the gravity of everything they do, but the visual metaphor is blatant on-screen.
Three middle-schoolers. Indistinct shadows that are shaped like their cognitive impressions of Kirijo, Akihiko and Shinjiro are fighting Shadows in the darkness of their mind. They're just kids. This isn't the kind of burden middle-schoolers should be left with, no matter all the jokes of chuunibyou abound.
In the distance, the sound of the crossing sirens cuts through the noise. Seconds later, a train horn echoes into the afternoon.
He lost control. The Persona went berserk. It crashed into a house. Seven Sisters High School. The classroom wall explodes too, and Myunghon finds themself bowled over, coughing from inhaling concrete debris, staring up at Castor. The same shot of Castor, in the Dark Hour, in that same household whose peace is violated forever.
"The child... is here now."
Smash cut to the passing train. Ken Amada is standing at the SEES dorms when the train passes. The train horn echoes again. The bells are playing again as the crossing gates raise. The shot's focused on the black and yellow stripes.
"He, too, is likely searching for truth," Myunghon has read between the lines. "... it is the truth we both cannot escape from. Yours has just come sooner than mine."
They gently push Shinjiro again. Another creak of the chains, swaying in the gentle summer wind.
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
As he starts being pushed on the swing, Shinjiro's a bit busy dissociating to complain. The creaking of the chains and the sound of cicadas, that train horn, the breath in his lungs and the unhealthy beart of his heart, he hears it all.
Myunghon mentions truth, and it feels like everything stops. The truth they can't escape from. Can he tell them? They deserve to know. But will it hurt them worse? They'll leave him. They can't have that kind of burden, not with the burdens they already have. It's not fair to them.
It's better that way, though. Honesty in exchange for loss. It's fine.
"After... Amada's death, I wanted to be punished. The Kirijo Corporation had it marked as a drunk driver. That's the official story... I-"
Another ragged breath, another push.
"I insisted. So I punished myself. I met Strega. I asked if they had anything to... control my Persona. They did, as the rumors had said. But... there'd be consequences to my body."
"I'm still facing them even now, Myunghon. ...the ferryman is always calling my name."
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
Myunghon is doing this in part because their own face is grave. They don't want to face Shinjiro and have to show them that. They have to be Hope for him, their constant in all the chaos. Like a star in the sky. He continues to explain, in the greyness of the clouds.
He wanted to be punished. It was all written away as a drunk driver. Money will do that. Myunghon's very familiar with money. That's the official story.
That's the truth fed to the world.
It's not Amada's truth.
It's not Shinjiro's truth.
Myunghon's eye slowly widens as he mentions Strega, and drugs... "Suppressors..." Myunghon murmurs. "There are rumours of a black market drug to that end. The details are very elusive. But there are people online that say you can obtain a source, for an exchange. You..." A pause.
Consequences.
Myunghon stops gently pushing Shinjiro. The creak of the chains can still be heard.
The ferryman is still calling his name.
"... how long?"
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
Shinjiro nods once when he hears the word suppressors. "They tasted like shit. Still do. But I took them. Once I did... I can't stop. They'll kill me if I do. ...they'll kill me if I don't."
If he could cry, he probably would. But he's never been the type. He's just got his eyes closed, dejected, as they ask that question.
"...organs and nerves are damaged. Doctor thinks I have maybe a year. They're looking for a 'cure' for me, but..." He trails off. How can you cure that?
His voice is so grave, so dark. So shallow. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought this up. I... just thought you should know. In case you wanted me to leave you alone." Umie didn't, but Myunghon... had enough on their plate.
Or maybe this is just the fear that nobody can or should care about the true Shinjiro Aragaki.
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
The clouds cruelly move at this part.
The sunlight is usually a ray of hope. It's also a ray of illumination. Deception can't hide behind it. It hits Myunghon like a truck. No, it's the revelation that does. Maybe it's both.
Myunghon isn't answering. Even as the slow creaking of the chains becomes longer and longer, and eventually comes to a halt. The suppressors kill him if he takes them. It'll also kill him if he stops, because his Persona will go berserk. More people will die, because of him. And that's worse than death, he doesn't have to explain. Perhaps his Persona can also kill him. Why should they expect him to be immune from a berserking Persona?
The organs and nerves are damaged. That's why he's always shivering. It's a reaction that's not unknown to them, given all their time in the White Room. They're looking for a cute. They're always saying that. It's to protect them, who has to see people in the worst days of their lives, every single day.
They're still not answering.
They're just.. standing there.
The cicadae are incessant.
When Shinjiro finally turns, their fingers are trembling. Their pupil is shrinking. Their lips are trembling.
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
Myunghon's silence, the halt of the chains, causes Shinjiro to breathe even more ragged. He did this he did this he did this he-
He stands up, which may seem as if he's going to leave for a long moment. He takes another breath, and turns to see Myunghon. Shaking, trembling. He knows what a panic attack looks like, feels like, how it breaks you down. He's had plenty himself.
In a swift movement, he's stepping around the swing. He doesn't know why he's doing it, just that every neuron in his brain is firing on him to do it. That if they're in this bad of shape, he needs to take responsibility and help them out of it. Maybe he needs it too.
A hand goes onto their shoulder, no longer bearing that cognitive coat as it is draped around his own. It's the only warning they get, before he moves again.
Shinjiro moves to envelop Myunghon in a hug, his body running cold as usual. He leans over their shoulder, trying to calm his breath.
"I'm sorry."
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
Where are they?
They're not sure where they are. In a galaxy far far away. Superluminary. Always ensconced with the desire to go faster than light, to let myriad thoughts dribble upon the surface of their brain like raindrops in a torrential downpour. There was always the possibility. Shinjiro wasn't ever healthy at the best of times. He was strong, and a powerhouse, certainly, but the cold spells, the coat, other symptoms they noticed while they were just idly talking...
The worst part about having a suspicion proven right is that it never, ever, ever feels good to be proven right. It just validates your fear even more.
Someone's touching them. The light is searing. If you squint closely, they might even be lightly frying in the sun. It's probably just a visual glitch. There's no way someone's actually cooking in the sun. Except in the ways people do, with little skin cells that go bad. You can die just from being in the sun, looking at the sun, the thing that you need in order to survive, as does all life.
How is that fair.
None of it is fair.
This isn't fair too.
Myunghon's body is no less warm. It's... strange, perhaps, to hug. Myunghon can't remember their last hug. They've had lots of hand contact from Yua, but Yua understand that hugging is usually a little more body contact than they'd like, even with very trusted people like her. To hug them feels like hugging something that's not going to be there with how brittle it feels, like if you were too forceful with your wafer or croissant and it snapped.
And not just because of physical dimensions either.
They've already given him a reaction. It's not the reaction they'd like to give him. They'd like to give him something in the shape of Hope. This isn't Hope. This is just naked Despair. The tears are starting again. They can't stop it. Desperately, their mind is trying to cling onto logic and reasoning, because logic and reasoning won't betray them like emotions will, but the logic center is being flooded and all the datacentres are shortcircuiting and there's no reasoning left when the laws of physics are all but broken.
Say something, damnit. Is this the first time he's confessed something like this? How did other people react? Umie would have a challenging smirk despite the news, they think; she thinks of the confidence as bravado, that she's a coward inside, but that mask is convincing, no matter how much she says it's papier-mache.
"... let's..."
Tacyhonic logic is wading through the waters of their emotions. They've found a door. A release valve.
"... let's get everything you want to do sorted by then, then. The Cardboard Dragon crew aren't strangers to deadlines."
What comes out is the most fragile little smile, done with closed eyes leaking with tears, lungs deprived of oxygen because they're forgetting to breathe. It's not convincing. But it's words formed in the shape of Hope, in the same way a gingerbread cookie house is technically a house.
That's the best they can do right now.
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
Shinjiro's hug is as gentle as possible, but it's also firm, like a blanket that's not going to hurt you but nor will it just fall off. It's not clear who exactly the hug is for, and Shinjiro's not capable of thinking about that right this second, but the answer may well indeed be 'both of them'.
After a long moment, he breaks off, seeing that smile as he pulls back. "Myunghon..."
Another breath. He's thinking through their words.
"...okay. ...what I want to do most is..." Can he ask that? Can he even say that? He's in such a fragile spot that it feels impossible. He has been for about two weeks now. Catastrophe after catastrophe, tragedy after tragedy. He could have avoided this ten years ago had he just-
"...stick around with all of you," he finally says after about twenty seconds of trying to find the words. "...If you'll still have me, I won't go anywhere yet."
A breath, as he looks around the shrine. "Do you want to go inside somewhere? You're burning up in the heat."
Even in the wake of his tragedy being shared, he's the person he cares about least of the two.
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
Reality is catching up hard with the volition unafforded to their body and they're sputtering and sobbing because they realised they're on full crying mode and that isn't enough to dam everything, and they finally plant their hands gently againt Shinjiro's front and starts sobbing into their shirt instead.
"Y-yeah... of course. Nothing's gonna change on that front..." Everything has changed. Where are you, Logic? You were flung away by the enormous wave of emotion that that bulkhead was damming for dear life and drowning. Now you're stuck with useless empty promises you can't keep. No, wait, it's still hanging onto the rails.
"You're still part of the crew... and we need you. We have one Palace to solve still... we still have to get the Joker Killer..." Oh, just look at Logic go, it's muscling up the rails even though the hallways are vertical and it's drowning in water now. Myunghon's still sputtering and sobbing as they say it, that smile threatening to drown at any moment.
"We need you on this side. Not the other side."
They feel like they can collapse. Shinjiro offers to take them somewhere inside. "Please." They have no idea where their parasol tumbled to. "I'm a bit unsteady at the moment."
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
Myunghon is initiating contact back. Shinjiro just places a gentle hand on their shoulder.
Nothing's going to change... Shinjiro knows that's probably not true, but he appreciates the hope. It's what he's always liked most about them.
But he's still part of the crew... they need him on this side, not the other side.
"...then I'll hold out as long as I can. I promise."
He steps away to scoop up the parasol, hefting it slowly over his shoulder, making sure Myunghon has shade. One might think he's their bodyguard in the way he tries to delicately make sure they're shaded as they walk towards the station nearby, since he can't take them to the dormitory. There's a little coffee shop, one that's mostly empty on a weekday evening like this, but they're open for a bit longer.
Closing the parasol once they reach it, he enters with Myunghon, finding a seat at a two-person table. "...don't worry about what mask you put on right now or how you sit. Anyone causes you issues, I'll step in."
And then, he has to address something before they continue, and before they get drinks.
"I... don't know that anyone else should know about this. Kirijo does. Akabane learned the other day. It's why I thought I should tell you."
"I felt you deserved to know."
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
Ironically, if they'd embraced their prescribed role more, they probably would be flanked by bodyguards. There was probably a scene, on the Other Side, where Myunghon is flanked by two men in suits, one holding their parasol, as they talk privately with Shinjiro and says:
We need you on the other side.
That's not this Myunghon. That Myunghon likely despised and thought of Shinjiro as an obstacle, someone to control, someone to ruin. Someone to make fear them.
That Myunghon died drowning, wondering if they could've just understood human beings a little better...
...
And that's why logic is drowning right now in their stead. They're quiet and barely there on the way to the coffee shop, looking really quite wilted -- it's not just in their head that they're having faint, dizzy spells, is it? The reprieve from the sun is a good thing, though, and even before Shinjiro says it's okay for them to sit how they want, they're already taking up the wall side with their legs up like they could disappear for a nap at any time.
They didn't demand the coat back though, if Shinjiro still wants it. But he might've draped the coat over their shoulder instead, and they don't refuse that.
Shinjiro shares who he's told, and Myunghon gently nods in turn. So Umie does know... they still wonder how she would've reacted. Probably less ideal than they imagined in their head -- but isn't it a courtesy for them to imagine she would've reacted with more grace?
"... thank you, for trusting and sharing the burden with me."
They choose those words more carefully, now that they've stopped crying. It doesn't sound distant or regretful. But they emphasize the sharing part.
"... what do you think ... causes the Persona to lose control, Shinjiro-ssi? We've been in a room with dozens of other users and people have not had issues with it. You and I have seen many people freshly awaken them with perfect control every time. I don't understand that part... it isn't a matter of having ill confidence or self-esteem. I would have the same prescription if that was what it took."
They don't share it, but they sure have had days where they wish Kudlak would just be done with them.
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
Shinjiro indeed draped the coat over Myunghon. Even in his own worst moments, he's still capable of putting someone else first.
"...sharing the burden, huh?" Shinjiro wonders. Is it really a burden he should share? Or one he should keep to himself? Either way, he gave it to them. So he needs to live with that now.
"...I was in the orphanage as far back as as I can remember. And as I can remember, I was always... impulsive. Angry. Getting into fights, acting first, unwilling to control myself. You've seen me fight... like a bull in a china shop."
He looks away, for a moment. "Some days I wonder if it was just... me. That I poisoned myself for no good reason. But... I don't know what else I could have done. When they just tell you that they'll fix it, that it'll be okay, and you feel like a monster... what else are you supposed to do?"
Shinjiro finally looks back. "...I know I didn't make the best choice. But... it's not like I didn't hurt that woman. That I didn't... make another child an orphan, to fall through the cracks." It's like he's trying to say he deserved it.
Eventually, a server comes over. Shinjiro orders a hot coffee, extra sweet. He needs something like that right now.
"I'll pay," he offers instinctively.
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
"Mmhmm. You said I deserved to know... and knowing it means sharing it," Myunghon whispers gently. There's a bit of a paradox with them at present where, perhaps, due to how more faint they are, they don't have as strong a grasp on their mask... and in turn, it makes them a bit more forthright with their answers.
That's just one of the many strange paradoxes of Myunghon's personality. They tighten their knees a little more around their face, even as a server stares at them strangely, but at least Myunghon took the shoes off. "A tea... just give me the teabag, I'll prepare it myself, thank you. No milk or sugar."
That's their default beverage anywhere. Tea, and they only soak it for at most twenty seconds, to make it very light. It's barely above drinking water. They definitely haven't had a meal, probably since leaving Sumaru, and this isn't calories. Their body needs calories, but they're not equipped for it at present.
Myunghon doesn't argue about paying, just gently nodding to themself. Now that they're in a safe place, though, Shinjiro can see them slowly move to something of that distant look when they're just stacking Koalas by themself. It's a state that they don't show a lot of people, and would normally not dare to show at a coffee shop. It's the state that they only normally really permit themself to be in when they're alone, mostly just thinking at speeds faster than light themself, getting a thousand wrong equations before finding the right one.
"... it doesn't make sense. It isn't you. How many temperamental types have you and I both met? Unseated ones? The most solid theory I have that unifies it all together is that cognition has power. It's why Rumours have power. It's why the Cognitive Coat functions. It's why Palaces are embodied in the shape that they are. But..."
They look blandly, like their gray eye is a void into nothingness for a moment. "The Suppressors spit on that... why something physical? What's the connection? I don't have answers. I desire answers... but to gain answers, I need more data... but I am not a biochemist."
But Shinjiro speaks to the reality that he still hurt that woman. That he still made an orphan. "The past will catch up with us, no matter whether how much wasted effort we spend running from it... we are unable to change it. The question for you now is... what that child feels. What they wish from you."
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
"...I guess you're right," Shinjiro tells Myunghon.
The server gives Myunghon an odd look, which only wilts away at Shinjiro's expectant look back to the server. She'll get them their teabag and water.
"...I don't know. I don't think it matters. What matters is the action," Shinjiro says. He chews on the thought. "Maybe we'll have answers someday. But for now... let's not worry about it."
He's still fragile and weak himself, but he's trying to now put on such a strong face, now that he feels he hurt Myunghon. It's fairly obvious, though. The teenager trying to show the adult he's strong...
What the child feels, though... "...I don't know. He doesn't know. He looked like he's never seen me in his life. But..."
A breath. "If he wanted revenge... who am I to stop that? ...though I don't have plans to tell him. Better to live in ignorance than suffer with knowledge, especially at that age...right? He'd never trust anyone again."
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
Is what matters the action? They're not sure. So many things line up when one assumes that there's a level of cognitive belief between them. That there is something that causes one's Persona to go berserk suggests an imbalance in one's cognition, but it's not one that many Persona-Users seem to struggle with. And if these drugs exist to address that imbalance, does that mean that brain chemistry does play a factor into it? And once THAT door is wide open, what other drugs can affect the supernatural world through one's cognition? Arrrrrrrrrrgh they wish they were the Myorei that said no to their father and just became a biochemist and eventually criminal drug dealer rather than the boring business fucking graduate corporate serial killer path they obediently fell down instead.
Shinjiro tells them to table the thought. He's trying to put on such a strong face. Myunghon knows because that's so much of their existence. So Amada looked like he'd never seen him in his life? But it's only a matter of time before he puts two and two together. He's there in SEES because of some measure of truth-chasing...
... or something much more sinister, and if that's the case, then the investigation Yukari gifted them should eventually bear fruit.
"... if he wants revenge," Myunghon quietly says, "Then your role in it is to not make him regret it for the rest of his life. Because you and I both know no one walks away from a revenge killing unscarred."
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
The drinks come out. Shinjiro takes a sip of his coffee, as he thinks on what to say next.
"...yeah. I won't tell him he can't. But... I'm not going to tell him it's a good idea, either. Far from it. But maybe making that decision himself, if it ever comes to it, will be healing. Can't say. We're purely in the realm of speculation..."
He goes to look Myunghon in the eyes.
"In the realm of reality... we still have a year. A year to stop the Old Maid, a year to... make peace, I guess, if I ever can." A pause.
"I'll be counting on you."
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
A year...
Shinjiro looks at them in the eye. Myunghon finds themself shivering a little. What's he reading into their eye right now? They're not certain. They're still concealing a lot of unresolved feelings and fear. A year feels like an infinitely large amount of time, and yet now they're certain they're going to be marking down each day like it's a countdown. A year might be generous. It might be half a year. It might be two weeks from now. What's to say they're not all going to get killed by that sniper from Kaneshiro's Palace. Sniper?
"... a year, yes," Myunghon whispers. "It's strange... what's happened in the last few moments, a year feels like it can be so much time when you've been brushing with death daily... it happened again after you left."
When?! It's only been a day. They and So-young went to have dinner with their mother, and then Shinjiro left on the train...
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
Shinjiro's not reading into anything. He simply wants Myunghon to know he's trying to face this head-on, instead of running away in this moment.
But Myunghon's response about a brush of death... he grimaces, heartbeat catching in his throat again. "...what happened? It wasn't him-" No, he stops himself. The NWO is supposedly dealing with it... right? As horrible as that feels to even think about.
"...you can tell me about it. I won't say a word. Just... let me help you again."
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
Myunghon looks confused for a moment, and then flinches when they realise they've said too much again. They're getting really loose-lipped. They're usually more guarded than this. First Umie, now Shinijro. They're so scared. That comfortable position they're in, as they sip their tea, is becoming a little bit more tense again now as they glance around, like there really could be someone bugging this coffee house 235.22km away from Sumaru City.
It wasn't him. The NWO is dealing with it.
Shinjiro tries to convince them. He tells them he won't say a word. Let him help them again...
They're so scared. The retribution from this might be even messier than Ishiba. Than anything they've faced. "... it was..." Their face nearly disappears into their knees.
"It was my mother."
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
Shinjiro can sense that fear. That discomfort. He shouldn't have pushed. "Sorry, I-"
But Myunghon continues. Their mother... Suzie Park. He tries to process. She tried to kill them? Their own mother? Their father despises them too, he assumes, just based off them wrecking his company. At least they have So-young now...
"...how can I help? Please don't tell me I can't. There has to be something I can..." He trails off. He's just some seventeen year old delinquent punk who gets people hurt and causes problems everywhere he goes.
What good is he here?
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
Myunghon visibly shrinks into themself, forgetting to breathe and letting everything accelerate again. Don't go into another panic attack. You can't survive two in a single day. It was a lot easier to deal when they were just focused on Shinjiro's problems. Could they still turn this around and still make it about his issue with the Amada child?
"I..." Myunghon sounds stricken when Shinjiro asks how he can help -- please don't say he can't. But they really don't know. They were begging Umie to not investigate her. There's something that's truly frightening behind the social and material power she has that's different. "I really don't know... I really do not... there's so much retribution at stake for more than just us, to innocent people, Shinjiro-ssi..."
There's a shallow, trembling breath as they do share: "... I begged Akabane-san to not investigate too." And now they've unwittingly tipped who else knows it. That's an avenue! "She's a Persona-User too. That's another advantage she has." ... but also a way in, because Castor can solve problems in ways only Shinjiro himself can't.
They shake their head, only feeling dead-ends. "I--I'll think of a plan. I always think of a plan. I'll let you know... sorry, I truly have been too loose-lipped." They're staring at the waiter at the far corner like they're a secret plant of the Baengnyong for a moment.
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
Myunghon is so scared. It breaks Shinjiro's heart. Retribution to them, to innocent people. And Suzie Park is a Persona-user...he's frowning.
Myunghon is about to panic. Loose-lipped, a plan... "Hey, hey. You're safe with me, alright? Anyone tries anything, I'm here. If you want me to hang out somewhere in Hirasaka near the shop tonight, if it'll help you feel safer, I can." He just wants to help so bad, even if he has his new dorm.
Maybe he'll have to do some research into Suzie Park. Myunghon's implying they want him to wait... but they waited for Ishiba, too, and what did that do but traumatize them further? Decisive action may be needed here. Shinjiro's disposable in the worst case, even if he'd rather not die yet, trying to stay as he promised.
It's fine. He'll figure it out.
<Pose Tracker> Myunghon Yeo has posed.
Myunghon deeply frowns, as they tuck a little deeper into themself. If they try any harder, they might just fuse into a little ball. And then they can roll away, bomb jumping one at a time. That'd probably make them happier. That's why they don't have that ability. "M-mm," Myunghon nods, as Shinjiro reassures them that they're safe. "... no, it's okay. I had a train booked before the sun's down. It should be safe enough for me to travel alone at that hour. There were a couple of other locales I needed to investigate here before I left."
They take several deep, centering breaths, at the count of four each. Four is death, though.
"... we should do that. Let's investigate." Myunghon offers, because throwing yourself into work's never killed anyone. "There was an information source in a Paulownia Mall club, but I do not know where that is..."
<Pose Tracker> Shinjiro Aragaki has posed.
Myunghon says they have a train booked, and they need to investigate first. He nods, listening to their breathing and breathing with them, to center himself.
"It's called Club Escapade. I know the way," he says at the mention of the info source. He downs his coffee real quick, moving to try and help Myunghon up once they're ready.
"Let's get to work."
They'll be fine tonight. But what stories does the future hold? They'll have to find out the hard way.